Monday, July 12, 2010

The Balancing Act...Part I

Can you a multi-task?

How many things can you do at once?

Let me rephrase...

How many men/women can you DO at once?

Get your mind out of the gutter please! (or stay there, I really don't care).  I'm talking about how many people you're dating at once.  Are you a serial dater or do you date more than one person at a time?

I kind of take on whatever life throws at me.  Meaning, if I happen to meet another person while I am dating, if we are not exclusive, I'll go ahead and date him too.
I like to keep my options open.  Sometimes, it can get a little hectic, because I have been known to make a date with more than one person in the same day.  (As I seem to say time and time again...Don't. Judge. Me.)

I eventually narrow it down to one person that I feel deserves to be the focus of my time and  interest.  I have the tendency to get bored easily and one man has never been able to keep my attention for long.  This could be due to the commitment issues I have ( I know, I know, but that's another post) ...or none of them were worth committing to?

There is also the notion that when you have too many options, it's too hard to choose.  When you have that many choices, you start to base the selection on superficial things like eye color or height.  When this was brought to my attention, I realized, that I gravitate towards the "better looking" option, rather than the smartest or best option. 

This is not my fault and I didn't even know I was doing it. It is a scientific fact (yep, I watch the Discovery Channel...get hip biatches) that humans are genetically predisposed to be attracted to people with symmetrical features a.k.a the attractive ones. 

So, it comes down to this... should I strictly date ONE person at a time to narrow my options? OR

Should I continue to date more than one person ( usually like 3 at a time, I got skills ok?), but override my natural instincts to go for the usual suspects now that I have learned from my flaws?

Maybe I'll try both and let you know what happens...LOL.

What do YOU guys think? Comments, Advice, Past Experiences?

The Balancing Act Part 2 is balancing dating/relationships with friends and family. Stay tuned... 

Random!: Speaking of The Discovery Channel...do you remember that song that went,"You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals, so lets do it like they do on The Discovery Channel!" ?


Anonymous said...

I remember that song about being mammals....it was funny at first, but then was just weird..lol. Personally, I could always date more than one guy at a time, but my jealous nature always got the best of me when I thought they should just date me and no one else. I know, it's a double-edged sword...but so what. It's my feelings. I don't know why I am so jealous but expect everyone else to be Ok with me dating around. It's not ego, even though it may sound like it...I can't really explain it. It just kills me to think of someone I care about...caring about someone else, I guess.

Jazz Stanton said...

Well yeah, you can only expect of others what you expect of yourself. I'm not the jealous type, so I guess that's why dating multiple people at the same time "worked" for me. If you care that much about one person dating other people, maybe you care enough about that person to date ONLY them, you just have to let them in on that secret too...

Queenie said...

Did you just call me a biotch? You're grounded!

Great post!

Anonymous said...

Well... I had an experience where I was dating more than one guy. The first I was really into, I mean the chemistry was banging but he was not consistent. You know the type that would disappear for a few days then re-surface telling me all the things I wanted to hear but should have ran from. Then comes along guy number two. He embodied everything that number one did not, and I liked him but in a different way. Eventually guy number 1 showed his true colors and I was hurt pretty badly. So what did I do??? I gravitated to guy number 2. He was my comforter and I needed and enjoyed this. Soon after we began a relationship, I even agreed to marry him but something was missing. He was the rebound guy and no matter how great he was he just was not the guy for me. Things got out of hand and the wedding was called off. Needless to say I had to pay the wedding off by myself...Not Fun. But looking back while it was never my intention to take things this far the hurt from guy number 1 clouded my judgment and guy number two ended up crushed. To this day I wish that I had taken time for self to really explore my feelings and get over some things versus rushing in with guy number 2. You live and you learn. My advice to anyone is to be sure that you can handle what you place on your plate and remember that your feelings my not be the only ones that end up hurt.

Warmest Regards,


Jazz Stanton said...

@ Queenie.. it's a term of endearment dah-ling...LOL...Thanks for stopping by.

@MyVerse... yeah that was a pretty sticky situation. I also have a bad habit of rushing into things, but like you, I have learned from past mistakes. Great advice too! Thank you so much for sharing...

AgapiStudios said...

great post and a great guest speaker ..

Queenie said...

I say, date as many as you can...well, within reason. You don't want to go mad trying to keep up with them all. I mean, eventually you'll settle down with someone, get married and wish that you would have 'dated around more'...plus, the more men you date, the more you get to choose from. :)

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