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Monday, August 9, 2010

Way to Kill A Mood...

We've all been there... You're about to get "dirty" and then the idiot says something to completely kill the mood.  

I called on my friends from Blog Catalog once again to help me out with this.  I asked them to give me "Things that should not be said during sex..."  

I had 100+  replies to sift through to pick the 10 funniest/worst ones!  Just  like the "10 Worst Pick-Up Lines", I listed the person that submitted, with a link to their blog.  

So, read, laugh, and check out these awesome blogs biatches! Don't forget to comment AND follow if you like what you see...

1. "Hey, I was just joking about that whole 'I love you' thing, is that cool?"
-- Konway East (Water Cooler, the

2. "Seriously.. Untie me."

3.  "The doctor said he was pretty sure it's not contagious." 
-- 2 and 3: Derek Bowles (The Mind of Derek Bowles

4.  ::Disappointed Expression:: "...is that it?!"
--The Boo (The Boo Report) 

5. "You look so much like my mother."  
--ASpotOfBlog (A Spot of Blog
 
6. "Is it alright if my friend watches?" 
--Andrew G. Carson (The Housebound Writer

7.  "I was born with a little penis... Actually it wasn't really a little penis, it was an extended clitoris... The doctor cut it off when I was born..." 
--FreakSmack (Funny Mugshots
FYI: He stated that someone ACTUALLY said that to him... FAIL!

8. "How'd you get these scratches on your back?" 
--Hank Plumley (Photography by Hank Plumley

9. "My Gary gets out of jail tomorrow!" 
--J. Dominic Fisher (Jacobin Reason

10. "That's not a wart, it's just a birthmark." 
--Alex (Cooking for Assholes

Well, that's all folks!  Those are pretty awful, right?  Think you can do worse? Drop it in the comments!

Toodles Biatches! 
 

16 comments:

Konway East said...

FreakSmack wins...if only because that comment has given me nightmares for the past week.
(ps. Great post...I really love the way you have been able to incorporate reader participation)

Jazz Stanton said...

LOL...FreakSmack won the last one too! He's holding out on me, because I bet he has a hell of a story to tell. Thanks Konway, how could I not include you guys? You're hil-ar-ious!

Andrew G. Carson said...

LOl, great list Jazz but it got me curious what would your personal "mood killer" be?

AgapiStudios said...

great and I get no points at all ...

Emma Murty said...

LOL, hilarious list especially as I know the story behind number 6 FYI it actually happened, lol, I would have said crying kills the mood very quickly. OK I'll spill the story it was a hippie chick he met in college who had a male room-mate who liked to watch her have sex and touch himself, creepy or what? Drew said he left sharpish, ROTFL.

Jazz Stanton said...

@ Andrew...well crying is one of them. I have actually asked someone, "Is it in yet?" so that pretty much killed that. If he can't kiss, it's pretty much over. And one guy actually said to me that he hadn't had "some sex" in a long time....that pretty much busted up the whole mood. LOL

@AgapiStudios...next time dahling...I want to keep doing posts like these.

@Emma... hey! LOL...that is pretty damn creepy. Thanks for coming by always nice to have you!

PrincessBeks said...

ok so it was New Year and i had been dating this guy for a few weeks and the sex wasnt great in fact the whole thing wasn't great but i think what topped it off was we were about to get naughty and he said 'can i sing to you while we make love', seriously? WTF, it wouldn't of been half as bad if it was actually a good song but no it was some random crap that i'd never heard of that wasn't in the slightest bit romantic, so he was a gonner!!

PrincessBeks said...

oh and i have to share this with my friends on FB, it's such a funny post!!

Jess said...

I don't have a quote, but the worst mood kiler I've ever experienced is being vomited on.

Seriously.

Definitely killed the mood.

Jazz Stanton said...

LOL @ Jess... and why haven't you sent me this story?

Hankmann said...

Great list. You have a great method of getting comments and engaging the reader !

Carry on !!! :)

PrincessBeks said...

@ jess OMG that is discusting!! i think that's more than a mood killer lol

Barry said...

It is hard to believe there are people out there like that - then again - people get nervous and say the darndest things!

FreakSmack said...

For the record, that wasn't said to me in the heat of the moment... This was said at the beginning of the date... There was no "moment".


Hmm... Smells like sourdough...

Jazz Stanton said...

@FreakSmack...doesn't make it any better...LOL!

Candace said...

OMG this was so funny!!!

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